The biggest mistake I made as a new mum
Updated: Aug 7, 2020
As I reflect on my journey of becoming a mum, there are so many things I’d have done differently especially in the first 6 months. Just as exciting as it was to welcome a new baby into our home, it was the most exhausting and challenging time of my entire life. I don’t want you to make the same mistake I made, beautiful mumma, so I’m writing this for you to share my experience.
One of the biggest mistakes I made as a new mum is that I didn’t make self-care my priority. As women, I think many of us tend to put ourselves at the bottom of our list. We are natural givers and we are constantly caring for others. With the arrival of our newborn baby, this quality within us gets even stronger. But when we’re like this 24/7 without a break to nurture and nourish ourselves especially when our basic needs are not met, we get depleted very quickly.
I underestimated the impact of sleep deprivation and extended hours of sitting on my wellbeing. I wish I did something sooner to change the situation, but the truth is, because of the lack of sleep, I couldn’t function properly. I had no energy and I just couldn’t think straight. I felt like I was on an airplane for the first couple of months completely jetlagged. My body clock was so messed up and I almost got mumsomina. I was just trying to “survive” the day and my body was screaming for help.
Not having 8-hour quality sleep I used to have, not having a minute to go to the bathroom let alone have shower and dry my long hair. I felt like I had NO time for myself anymore. I soon realised nothing good can come out of the state of deprivation. I was moody and resentful of not having my basic needs met. I had to do something to end this state. So I started asking hubby to help me more. To take the baby out so I can catch up on sleep, do yoga etc. I only started feeling a bit more normal after my sleep quality improved and I started doing little things everyday to make myself happy including yoga & meditation.
So beautiful mumma, make a commitment to take a good care of yourself today and every day because you’re the only person who can take care of you. Ask for help so someone can watch your baby while you get much needed rest and time to nurture and nourish you. Focus on doing things that make you happy no matter how small they may feel. Get out of the house, go for a nature walk and soak up some Vitamin D. Roll out a mat, stretch out and meditate. Nap when your baby sleeps and if you have trouble napping during the day, pop your eye pillow on and just do savasana or yoga nidra. Staying active is just as important as giving yourself rest especially if you had an active lifestyle before. It’s really important to move our body when you’re not nursing or breastfeeding your baby as our body isn’t designed to sit all day all night.
When we board an airplane, we’re instructed to put our own oxygen mask first before helping others. When we don’t help ourselves, we cannot be helpful to anyone. When we have a newborn baby, all our attention goes to her and we completely forget to take care of ourselves. But the thing is that we cannot pour from an empty cup. We need to fill our cup first. Self-care isn’t selfish. It’s an essential piece of a puzzle to find the happiest and healthiest version of yourself.
I found that doing little things everyday had more lasting impact on my wellbeing rather than waiting for 5 months to take a weekend away alone. (Go listen to my TENT talk that I gave at Sydney Vegan Festival if you wanted to hear more about this. It’s available on my Facebook page, Wa Yoga) Little bit of home yoga & meditation became my daily self-care ritual as a mum. To me, it was one of the most loving things I could do to myself when my baby napped. Tapping into a little bit of silence and stretching out my body in different ways through yoga & mindfulness helped me feel I was myself again.
So, beautiful mumma, make sure to find at least 10 minutes every day to do something that makes your soul sing. Hopefully you can make even more time on weekends when you’re likely to receive more help. I know you have lots on your to-do list but nothing is more important than your health & wellbeing. Dishes can wait. Cleaning and laundry can wait. Take responsibility of your own health & wellbeing. There's a lot of power in what we do everyday. Take care of yourself every single day! You deserve as much love and attention as your precious little baby.
I have a special gift for you! If this post has resonated with you and you're ready to take inspired action to make yourself a priority, I invite you to join me for FREE 3-day online event, called "3 days to Calm Motherhood" Hit the link below for full details and make sure to register your spot today!
FREE online live event
3 days to Calm Motherhood
18 - 20 August 2020
All you need is 15 minutes each day and recordings will be available until 23 August so you can watch the videos in your own time
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How to reduce stress: 6 tips for new mums
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5 yoga hacks for new mums who have no time
Chika is the founder of Wa Yoga (Wa is a Japanese word meaning harmony). She is a Yoga Australia registered teacher, student of yoga for 12 years, teaching yoga & mindfulness for the last 6 years and mum to an almost 4-year old daughter. She specialises in offering online courses and memberships for mothers of young children and young families. She has a gentle approach to teaching yoga and her classes are always infused with mindfulness, reminding people to slow down and come back to the present moment. Her mission is to inspire and motivate other mums to start incorporating yoga & mindfulness into their daily self-care ritual.
She is a creator of Calm & Relaxed Mama, the 4-week online course to help mothers find calm in short & sweet express class. (30-minutes) Her course helps you build sustainable home practice and help you embody mindful living in every moment of motherhood. Find out more about her course here (starts Wednesday 2nd September 2020)
She is also a creator of Mindful Mama Membership, the online membership for mothers who aspire to embrace mindful, creative, earth-friendly living. The next enrolment period for Mindful Mama is late September. If you'd love to be the first one to find out full details of the membership and receive early bird bonuses, send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org